MaggyMay is our new Friend=AngelI gave her welcome=hugs & asked her to tell us a little about herself. MaggyMay just sent me the following email. HAVE YOU EVER HAD THE SAME FEELINGS ABOUT DEPRESSION? SHARE YOUR EXPERIENCES AND WORDS OF WISDOM 


Stan




Stan,


I’m 33 years old and love life. I love music and get involved in playing it. I play flute and keyboards. I also like to compose and arrange. I love art too. I like to draw and paint. Watercolour is my favourite but I’m trying to get the hang of using acrylics.

I’d like to maybe teach music, I got an 8th grade for flute. But like most things connected with work I can’t seem to keep up any kind of consistency.

There’s the M.S. of course and oh yes it’s only part of life and doesn’t define me. But it does restricts me. It makes each day unchartable. I know it’s not the same for everyone and I don’t drown in my own self pity. It’s just the facts of it.

Added to that, I suffer from bouts of depression. It’s something that I can’t really understand because I am so often a positive thinker. One therapist said I was a smiling depressive. Well if you going to be any kind of depressive…

I am fortunate that I am self sufficient. I live alone. Yeah, I’m single and at the moment unattached. My parents help with what they can and would have me back with them at the drop of a hat. Money is tight but then I’m better off than some people in other countries.

I have some good friends that come and take me to the shops and for something to eat. Generally just spending time, hanging. We sometimes go for a drink, or a meal.

My M.S.......

I’ve read all the things that people say about it. I’ve read all the descriptions about what it is, about what it does and that no one is average. No-one is the same as another. I’ve read about how people react. I was devastated. I was scared. I’ve read about what we should think. But I’m not a follower of instructions when it comes to my feelings. I got scared. At a time when I had never even heard of the thing.

I was 18 when things started happening. Now I say that, but I remember when I was 14, then 16 and some strange things happened. My left foot would go to sleep. And stay that way, like it was in hibernation or something. But at 14 it was nothing. A little strange. It went away. At 16 my left upper leg got “a bit numb.” I just thought it was one of those things and never really pursued it. Eventually it went away.

At 18, it hit me like a brick. Starting with my lower left leg and foot then within a few days both legs. “parathesia,” there’s a word I wish I never had to learn. Numbness and pain. Difficulty lifting my feet. Mostly my left foot.

My GP said straight away he thought it could be M.S. but would need to investigate. From what I have read it seems rare for a GP to commit his thoughts like that. But he proved to be right. Many tests later I was given the diagnosis.

Like most people I think I was in denial for a long time. Thinking it would get better and when I first was in remission, thinking it had. It took a long time to start to accept it. I didn’t know weather to fight it or accept it. I still think I’m trying to find the balance.

I’ve said way more than I wanted to about the M.S. but, no matter what I say about it not defining me, it is a part of me.

Where I live.....
I live in the North East of England. It’s a beautiful place but even the people I know don’t seem to have time to recognise it. I love to get out when I can into the green or by the sea. I love the sea and the way it comes to greet you at the shore with it’s own unique voice. I love the crashing of the waves if the weather isn’t so good. The power of white swirling crests as they beat down onto the beach. I try to traverse the sand and love the different world that surrounds me as I leave the built up area just meters away and surround myself in the saline atmosphere of the shore.

Well. That’ enough for now. I hope this is enough of an introduction of myself.

PLEASE DONT GET MAD ADD ME MY 3 ANGELS...I ONLY HAD 2 VIDEOS ON MY COMPUTER...

xoxoxo
stan

ps...OMG...THIS IS SO EASY TO POST A VIDEO WITH

OMG!!!!

ADDING THIS PHOTO IN BLOGGER IS 100% EASIER THAN ON MySpace!!!

xoxoxo

STAN